i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
Randomize
