GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
My vagina just clenched in fear
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
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