I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
Randomize