dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
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