...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
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