He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
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