You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
Randomize
