Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
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