There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
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