like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night