So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
Randomize
