these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
Getting a high five from your dog when you're stoned is one the greatest rewards of being a pet owner.
Im really high right now and the vending machine is broken and giving out free candy. Please kill me, my life will never get better than this
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
I just took the kind of shit that makes your eyes well up with tears as you feel it moving inside of you... So cleansing.
As your only female friend, I feel the need to inform you that texts like these are why she dumped you.
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
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