yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
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