Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
Randomize
