high people should be assigned attendants
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
I have tasted many bathrooms
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
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