So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
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He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
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