i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
Randomize
