Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
Just saw a girl leaving CVS on her bike with a case of beer. She tried to ride one handed with the case under her other arm and fell over off the sidewalk. I'm glad to see someone else's life is a bigger joke than mine.
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
Randomize
