when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
That's the last time you call me to prove to some girl at a bar that you're English. It's bad enough that you actually get to fuck them because of it without having to wake me up to seal the deal.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize