i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
I just accidently sent my poop smells like vodka to 27 people in my phone book
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
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