If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
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