I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
How many fucks given?
0.12846
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
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