when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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