He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
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