you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Randomize
