why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
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