Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
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