Can Purell be used as lube?
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
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