and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
How I know I've been single too long: I'm reveling in finding out my taken friends are being tragically dumped
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
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