OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
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