i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Randomize
