that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
If you don't answer the phone then I will be forced to leave you a wonderful voicemail of me throwing up
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
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