The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
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