and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
Yea i'm supposed to have jury duty on monday. Hope they don't mind me still being drunk.
Na you can't get charged for public intoxication unless you're outside. I checked.
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
Need ride home. Girls. Stolen keg. Rolling down streets. Horny girls. No condoms. Rescue needed. girls and beer in exchange for rescue and bacon?
I. Hate. You. Where are you, are said girls cute, and how did you know I bought bacon? And how does this always happen to you?
Smarter than the average bear
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
Randomize
