you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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