just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
they're like a gay fantastic four
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
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