Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
handjob tips. give me some.
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize