I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
So I'm dropping a fat deuce at work, and the lock on the stall door slips and the door slides open, when suddenly someone comes in. Now I have two options, I can either get up quickly and try to shut the door quickly (not easy to do with one hand) or I can just sit there and play it off like it's no big deal and I always dump at work with the door open. I chose option two, and it was as awkward as it sounds.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Randomize
