yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
Randomize
