He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
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What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
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Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
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