Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
She's making her own pesto again. Cooking spaghetti in the microwave and "frying" vegetables in the toaster oven. All this while wearing the yellow rubber gloves and saying that the pesto has feelings like a real person. Im terrified.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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