who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
Randomize
