My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
The oven caught fire. I put it out, but called the fire department just to make sure it was okay since the smoke wasn't going away
You just wanted to meet firemen
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