8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
I skipped work to stalk him.
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
Randomize
