Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
Randomize
