I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
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