At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
Randomize
