nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Randomize
