so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
Randomize