I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
Randomize