btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
We had sex on a dog bed..
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
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